Grief After Abortion: Why You Feel It & What to Do With It

When I was recently flipping through some of my old prayer journals, I came across something that stopped me in my tracks.

Scrawled across the page were these words:

“God, please take care of my baby. I hope he or she knows I am sorry and that I love them.”

I don’t even remember writing that, but it hit me hard. What those words revealed is that—even back then—I was grieving. At the time, I wouldn’t have called it grief. I didn’t think I was “allowed” to grieve, because I was the one who chose abortion. But deep down, my heart knew it was a loss.

Why grief after abortion is real

So many women don’t connect the word grief with the word abortion. We’re told it’s a decision, a procedure, or a choice—but rarely is it spoken of as a loss. Yet that’s exactly what it is. Abortion ends a pregnancy, and with it, the life of a child. Whether we admit it or not, our hearts recognize that loss.

That’s why sadness, guilt, or confusion may rise up months—or even years—later. These emotions don’t make you weak or broken. They make you human.

What grief after abortion looks like

Grief doesn’t always look like tears and obvious sadness. Sometimes it looks like:

Feeling numb when the topic of abortion comes up.
Avoiding babies, baby showers, or pregnancy announcements.
A quiet ache when you hit the anniversary date of your abortion.
Guilt, shame, or anger you can’t quite explain.

Grief shows up differently for everyone, but the underlying reality is the same: you’ve experienced a loss, and your heart longs to process it.

What to do with that grief

The good news is this: you don’t have to stay stuck in unspoken grief. God’s Word tells us He is near to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18). That includes you.

You can bring your grief to Him, lay it at the cross, and begin walking in freedom. That may look like:

Journaling and naming your emotions.
Talking with a trusted Christian mentor or counselor.
Joining a post-abortion recovery community.
Turning to God daily with honesty and prayer.

You don’t have to carry the weight alone.

An invitation to go deeper

If this resonates with you, I want to personally invite you to my Abortion Recovery Workshop happening tomorrow, September 9th at 1 PM CT.

In this free 45-minute live workshop, we’ll cover:

What grief after abortion really looks like.
Why you may be feeling these emotions—even if you were “sure” about your choice.
How to move forward into healing and freedom with Christ.

You’ll also be entered to win some great door prizes, including a free 30-minute 1:1 coaching call with me!

👉 Register now at brittanypoppe.com/workshop.

Friend, you don’t have to stay in silence with your grief. God is ready to meet you, heal you, and walk with you toward freedom.